{"id":53522,"date":"2016-10-26T07:15:05","date_gmt":"2016-10-26T11:15:05","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/dailyburn.com\/life\/?p=53522"},"modified":"2016-11-11T15:27:28","modified_gmt":"2016-11-11T20:27:28","slug":"introverts-vs-extroverts-guide","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/dailyburn.com\/life\/lifestyle\/introverts-vs-extroverts-guide\/","title":{"rendered":"How Introverts Can Stay Sane in an Extroverted World"},"content":{"rendered":"
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Photo: Twenty20<\/a><\/figcaption><\/figure>\n

We live in a culture that privileges extroverted traits. (Think: assertiveness, talkativeness and sociability, to name a few.) And this can make it pretty darn challenging to be an introvert in the United States.<\/p>\n

\u201cThere\u2019s an extrovert expectation that\u2019s imposed on children from the time they can walk and talk,\u201d says Beth Buelow, author of The Introvert Entrepreneur: Amplify Your Strengths and Create Success on Your Own Terms<\/em>. \u201cAmong the first things we look for are social skills… When certain benchmarks aren\u2019t met, parents and teachers start to worry that something is wrong\u2026 But there\u2019s also the possibility that the child is more introverted and simply needs space<\/a> to develop his or her social skills in a different way.\u201d<\/p>\n

This tendency to define extroverted traits as \u201cnormal\u201d and introverted characteristics as \u201cabnormal\u201d doesn\u2019t end in childhood. \u201cThese extrovert expectations extend to adolescence and adulthood, with a near constant pressure<\/a> to be social, participate in endless extracurricular activities (often involving teams and lots of people), and popularity being valued over work ethic,\u201d Buelow continues.<\/p>\n

The pressure to demonstrate one\u2019s worth through being assertively vocal extends throughout the workplace, political and social landscapes. \u201cCulturally, we put extroverts front and center on television and online,\u201d says Buelow.<\/p>\n

But the privileging of extroversion over introverted traits comes at a cost, for both introverts and everyone else. Here\u2019s how to reclaim your introversion and take care \u2014 even in our extroverted world.<\/p>\n

RELATED: <\/strong>Stressed Out? Here\u2019s How to Finally Find Relief<\/a><\/p>\n

What Sets Introverts Apart<\/strong><\/h2>\n

“Introverts listen more than we speak, so we\u2019re typically less vocal than extroverts.”<\/p><\/blockquote>\n

\u201cThe key difference between an introvert and an extrovert lies in where we get our energy from,\u201d says Michaela Chung, Introvert Coach and author of The Irresistible Introvert: Harness the Power of Quiet Charisma in a Loud World<\/em>. \u201cIntroverts gain energy from being alone, and lose energy in stimulating environments such as crowds and social settings. Extroverts, on the other hand, gain energy from being out and about and socializing. This is why introverts prefer to spend more time alone<\/a>, in quiet settings, while extroverts like to be where the action is.\u201d<\/p>\n

There\u2019s a neurological basis for these differences, says Laurie Helgoe, a clinical psychologist and author of Introvert Power: Why Your Inner Life is Your Hidden Strength<\/em>. \u201cIntroverts experience more cortisol arousal [in the presence of] external stimuli,\u201d she says. Introverts\u2019 brains are also aroused by more subtle stimuli, while extroverts are more attuned to obvious stimuli. What this means is that \u201cintroverts have a lower threshold for stimulation,\u201d says Helgoe.<\/p>\n

Additional differences between introverts and extroverts crop up in the way they communicate, says Buelow. \u201c[Introverts] listen more than we speak, so we\u2019re typically less vocal than extroverts,\u201d she says. \u201c[Introverts\u2019] communication style \u2014 at work and home \u2014 is more introspective<\/a>, and we do best if we have time and space to think things through, rather than being put on the spot.\u201d Meanwhile, says Chung, \u201cextroverts are known for carrying fast-paced conversations with fewer pauses.\u201d<\/p>\n

Of course, none of this is to say that introverts are always reclusive and extroverts never have thoughtful conversations. \u201cWe all exist on a spectrum and have both types of energies within us. Introverts need people, and extroverts need solitude,\u201d says Buelow. \u201cWhat\u2019s worth noticing is your default and where you do your best work.\u201d<\/p>\n

RELATED: <\/strong>7 Super-Sneaky Benefits of Mindfulness<\/a><\/p>\n

The Many Strengths of Introverts<\/strong><\/h3>\n

\u201cIntroverts have many innate strengths, such as intuition, creativity, focus and observation.”<\/p><\/blockquote>\n

While it\u2019s easy to make comparisons between extroverted and introverted tendencies, Helgoe stresses it\u2019s important not to conceptualize introversion as merely the lack of extroverted traits. For example, extroverts often get characterized as active while introverts are labeled as passive. \u201cBut it\u2019s more accurate to say the introvert is reflective,\u201d says Helgoe. \u201cIt\u2019s not the absence of action.\u201d<\/p>\n

When we stop conceptualizing introverts as \u201cfailed extroverts,\u201d it becomes easier to see the many strengths that introverts bring to the table.<\/p>\n

\u201cIntroverts have many innate strengths, such as intuition, creativity, focus and observation,\u201d says Chung. \u201cThey are deep thinkers who bring a wealth of imagination and insight to the table. An introvert\u2019s ability to spend time alone, and actually enjoy it, is also a gift.\u201d<\/p>\n

Buelow adds, \u201cIntroverts may exhibit several of these positive traits, all of which can be extremely important in the workplace<\/a> and a relationship:<\/p>\n